can I type on my back?

You better believe it!
Here I am typing on my back immediately after try #2. The wifey, who ps might be a workout-aholic, decided that it was time for her "run" post insemination so I get to watch the history channel and hope that the laptop doesn't fall on my head as I type on my back.
We pretty much have this whole AHI thing down to a science. We say ridiculous things to one another through the whole process, laugh at how absurd we feel and pray for the best (I am sure many of our readers can relate).

In other news, my recent interview went well. I believe I used may have knocked it out of the park, but I can not say the same for the people that interviewed me. The last time I really job searched I didn't have a job. This time I do and it feels very different. I am pretty sure that they are going to offer me the job, but I probably will turn them down. I just dont think it was the right fit for me. And the job, which I would be great at, really isn't what I want to do. It is a judicial affairs job at a community college but also it working with the behavioral intervention teams (or threat assessment). Which basically means I would be coordinating the teams that decide cases like this. I dont know if I want to do that. Ok, I KNOW I dont want to do that. Which ps the job description had one line about this part of the job and then when I interviewed I was told that it was a major part of the job. No thank you, i dont care how much money you are going to pay me* I dont want to do it.

So on top of TTC I am looking for a new job and am probably in the busiest time of year in my job. Not that I have to avoid stress in order to get the BFP or anything...





*so they may be paying double what I make now...but money isnt everything...right?

Awkwardness Abounds

So we are official...last night was try #1. Let me tell you what happened. With my pictorial interpretation

So, we had already scheduled with KD that I would be coming over to his house to get his swimmers at around 10:30pm*.

I got there a little late, which was okay by him. I wasn't nervous driving there and I wasn't nervous when I got there. I gave him his sterile collection cup and "pre-approved" lubricant. He seemed nervous...or maybe just tired. Anyway he wasn't a chatty cathy as he normally is, but who can blame him.

via

I asked him if he would be more comfortable having me wait outside his house in my warm and toasty car and he said yes.Which I was also most comfortable with. So I went out to my car and I waited and waited and waited for what seemed like forever.

via

I texted back and forth with CS, checked my twitter feed and facebook stalked. FINALLY he called me and let me know he was done and that we would meet me at the front door. I jumped out of the car and went to get the "specimen". He was there and seemed to be more at ease**. I took the cup, stuck it under my armpit inside my coat and then chit chatted for about 1 minute before I was like...ok I gotta go.

I got back to my car, buckled up and proceeded back to the casa. On my way back, I was on the highway and of course the police have blocked all lanes of traffic...meaning that I have to get off the highway and take the side roads home. This would not be a problem if I was good with directions, but even using a GPS I get lost. So as I got off the highway, I was enabling the "highway avoidance" on the GPS while keeping the cup upright and warm and trying not to get into an accident. I finally got a new route that seemed good and continued on my way.

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As soon as I got home CS leaped into action getting all the necessary items together. And then we did it. While we were preparing the sperm, of course CS and I gagged...twice...since we are both Gold Stars*** Which only made us laugh...and then laugh some more. It was, how do you say, awkward...

CS asked me "Are you ready?" I said " As ready as I will ever be" and it was done.
So there you have it. Try #1.1 done. We have try #1.2, #1.3 and #1.4 scheduled for more decent hours...
All in all it was, how do you say, awkward...but well worth it.

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*The pobrecito is a starving artist and works 2 jobs...so he didn't get home until after 10pm...hence the late pick up.

**I would be more at ease too if I had just orgasmed...

***While I may be a bisexual, I have never had sex with a man. I was a good girl....

A delayed start

So as I was lurking and trolling online reading blogs this morning as I didnt get ready for work since we have a delayed opening...I began to ponder some things. First, let me preface this with the fact that I have big dreams for myself, which I often do not share with anyone and rarely admit to myself. I dream of one day having my own successful *insert money making scheme here* and being able to make my own hours and not have to report to "the man". I dream of a big family living in a 2 car garage home on a corner lot with mature trees and excellent municipal services. I dream of being able to hang a rainbow flag outside of our house and not worry that it will get egged. I dream of growing old with CS, taking crazy vacations, surprising our kids with a trip to disney world, becoming some sort of "artist" and getting pregnant on try no. 1 (which is today p.s...like how I slipped that in there)*. 

Some of my dreams are tangible, real, and possible...others are flights of fancy. But either way I feel like I have gotten on a delayed start with all of them. Here I am, about to be 28**, living on a college campus in a dorm because I have a job that requires it, no kids, hating my job and having a burning desire to figure out if this is what I want***. I ponder, mull, stew, ruminate, noodle around, and think through what my next steps should be.

Should I go to get my PhD...and in what?
Do I secretly want to be an artist and make fun things on the intrawebz?
Should I go to law school?
Should I go to seminary?
Do I want to live here forever or can I convince CS to move back to my great white north?

Lots to think about, pray about, meditate on, etc etc etc.

And now for your entertainment, my sister in law posted this on fb yesterday and I had to share. She loved it because at one point she was very serious about becoming a sign language interpreter.





*I know that a BFP is unlikely on try No. 1...but a girl can dream. I'm okay with not getting pregnant this cycle, but it would be great. I, unlike CS, have been blessed with the gift of patience. 


**28 is young, I know...but most of the 28 yr olds I know seem to be adrift...are really really immature...making me feel older than I really am because I sorta have it together.


***Getting pregnant is what I want...being with CS is what I want...but all the other stuff is up for grabs. 

Oh Amazon

If anyone ever got a hold of my amazon.com search and purchase history they might have a few questions...like

Why do you need all those specimen cups?...

The needle-less syringes? I dont understand...

EEEEWWW... you bought disposable speculums?

Well yes, yes I did buy all that stuff. And thank you amazon.com for providing me with an avenue to buy all of this from the comfort of my couch while watching ancient aliens on the History Channel.

Oh how fun it is to amass the supplies you need for at home insemination.